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Jokes Computer-Illiterates The following is an excerpt from the Wall
Street Journal by Jim Carlton.
1. Compaq is considering changing the command "Press Any Key" to "Press
Return Key" because of the flood of calls asking where the "Any" key is.
2. AST technical support had a caller complaining that her mouse was
hard to control with the dust cover on. The cover turned out to be the
plastic bag the
mouse was packaged in.
3. Another Compaq technician received a call from a man complaining that
the system wouldn't read word
processing files from his old diskettes. After trouble- shooting for
magnets and heat failed to diagnose the problem, it was found that the
customer labeled the diskettes then rolled them into the typewriter to
type the labels.
4. Another AST customer was asked to send a copy of her defective
diskettes. A few days later a letter arrived from the customer along
with Xeroxed copies of the floppies.
5. A Dell technician advised his customer to put his troubled floppy
back in the drive and close the door. The customer asked the tech to
hold on, and was heard
putting the phone down, getting up and crossing the room to close the
door to his room. True story from a Novell NetWire SysOp: Caller:
"Hello, is this Tech Support?" Tech: "Yes, it is. How may I help you?"
Caller: "The cup holder on my PC is broken and I am within my warranty
period. How do I go about getting that fixed?" Tech: "I'm sorry, but did
you say a cup holder?" Caller: "Yes, it's attached to the front of my
computer." Tech: "Please excuse me if I seem a bit stumped, It's because
I am. Did you receive this as part of a promotional, at a
trade show? How did you get this cup holder? Does it have any trademark
on it?" Caller: "It came with my computer, I don't know anything about a
promotional. It just has `4X' on it." At this point the Tech Rep had to
mute the caller, because he couldn't stand it. The caller had been using
the load drawer of the CD-ROM drive as a cup holder, and snapped it off
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