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Filthy Monkeys, Typewriters, the Usual...

Uni McRabbit:

Upon consideration of the holy relic they would be transporting, TFAW went 
all out in its packaging strategy:  They first used the indestructible Brown 
Box of Mystery (AC - 10), wrapped in the Mystic Extra Sticky Tape of Glory.  
Upon the inside of the BBoM 

(if it can be said to have an "inside" [there is a great debate raging even 
now among topological conundrum connoseuirs])

were the Ancient Styr-o-foam Peanuts of the Beyond.  This magical blend of 
all the best shock absorbers in the universe was made even better by running 
candidates through the Sieve of Erasthonese, which allowed only the "prime" 
(math joke!) ones into the BBoM.  

AS you can see, it would be impossible for TFAW to send you a Holy Lunchbox 
(which, by the way, comes with a Groo postcard inside), because I have the 
only packing materials in the Universe worthy of carrying the sacrosanct 

Thank You. 

-That "Pious" Guy Daniel

PS:  This post was a lot funnier in my head.  But then again, a lot of things 
are funny in my head.